You’re facing a personal decision, and only you can make it. Seek support if you need it, but don’t let yourself be rushed. Because choices are often made under time pressure, questions for self-reflection can help you weigh your options calmly—especially with an eye to the long-term impact of an informed, self-determined choice.

1) Termination of pregnancy

Although the termination of pregnancy is widely accepted in society, this remains a deeply personal decision—and its consequences are yours to live with. Don’t choose for others. Don’t let yourself be pressured. Trust your instincts, even when time is short. It can help to consider different scenarios and take the long view—for example, how you might feel about your choice in a few years.

There are many forms of support available for pregnant women in need, including housing (especially for those in training or facing financial hardship), financial assistance (e.g., sponsorships or regular payments), childcare support, and respite options (such as “grandmother” services, childminders, or residential groups). Organizations offering advice and support include the Federal Ministry for Family Affairs, Caritas, Diakonie, the Mother and Child Foundation, ALfA, Lawyers for Life, Doctors for Life, and Donum Vitae.

2) Temporary care

If you’re unsure, or you choose to continue the pregnancy, the coming months give you space to think things through calmly. If you’re in education or training, temporary care options—such as short-term or emergency foster care—may help; regular visits can usually be arranged.

3) Long-term care

If taking on permanent responsibility for your child isn’t possible, you might consider long-term foster care or adoption.

In long-term care, you retain the right of access to your child. The frequency and extent of contact depend on the child’s needs and are usually arranged with the local youth welfare office. Children grow into their foster families and form bonds there—often quite quickly, and regardless of the legal situation. As a parent, you generally remain responsible for financial support and certain parental duties; at the same time, your decision-making rights are limited. For the well-being of the child, it is essential that all parties involved cooperate and avoid conflict. Decisions that involve sacrifice can be very challenging emotionally, so do not hesitate to make use of counselling services if needed.

Please note: Regulations may vary depending on the federal state. A personal consultation at a youth welfare office or specialist advice centre, for example, can provide clarity.

4) Consent to adoption

When you give your child up for adoption, you relinquish all your parental rights. Legally, your child becomes part of the adoptive family, who assume all parental rights and responsibilities. Your child is fully protected within the adoptive family, just as a biological child would be. Information on the relevant procedures, requirements and processes is available from counselling centres and local youth welfare offices. There are generally three forms of adoption to choose from.

• Anonymous consent to adoption:There is no direct contact, and identities are kept confidential. Confidential documents—such as letters, photos, reasons for the decision, and family or health history—can be deposited with the youth welfare office. This information is stored securely, and the child can generally access the file from the age of 16.
• Semi-Open Adoption: if possible, select the youth welfare office for the child’s future place of residence. Specialists present profiles of prospective adoptive parents, on which the decision is based. Identities are usually protected, with communication handled through the youth welfare office.
• Offen: it is possible to meet the adoptive parents in person and to agree on a contact framework together. Typical elements include regular progress updates (e.g., annually) and greetings or messages on special occasions (birthdays, Christmas), usually facilitated through the youth welfare office. Where appropriate, 1–2 in-person visits per year can be arranged. The birth mother is often mentioned by her first name, and all contact arrangements are set jointly

Please note: Which form is right for you depends on your needs and the legal context. The youth welfare office or a specialist counselling centre will agree the binding arrangements.